Divorce Knocked Me Off of My Feet Harder and for Longer than I ever Expected!
Hello Healing Divorcee,
When I got married at the ripe age of 18, I thought my marriage would last forever. I never dreamt that I would wind up divorced. Especially not after 20 years of marriage!
I’m sure that divorce was as much of a shock to you as it was to me. When we get married, we believe its forever.
I was not prepared for the raging, intense emotions that seemed to change hour by hour. I was an emotional wreck. Within a 60-minute period I could experience rage, depression, confusion and happiness plus a whole lot more. I felt as if my heart was literally breaking.
The pain seemed unbearable, I just wanted it to STOP!
You might be in the same place I was or you might be a little bit ahead or behind. Bottom line is that my divorce left me devastated! I was lonely, fearful and depressed. I didn’t feel like doing anything. I didn’t feel attractive. Basically, I didn’t feel like there was life left to be lived.
I’m going to tell you what shifted for me in just a few minutes. But first, let me ask you a question. What is going on for you right now?
- Do you feel stuck even though your divorce is legally over?
- Are you in the process of divorce?
- Are you considering divorce?
Continue reading, as I’m sure you will be able to relate to my story.
Is Your Divorce Harder Than You Anticipated?
You are in a really frustrating and difficult situation right now. I know that you are doing the best you can with what you’ve got.
So often, I have clients tell me that they shouldn’t be feeling the way they do. The fact is, you are right where you are supposed to be in this moment in time. If you had everything to do over again, would you make the same decisions? Why?
When you make a decision, you are basing it on ALL of your life experiences and your interpretations of these events up until that moment in time. It’s just like the old saying, “Hindsight is 20/20.” When we look back, we can see a sequence of events, thus things are obvious that were not apparent from the beginning. This is why you are able to evaluate past choices more clearly than at the time you made the original decision.
It’s OK that you are where you are. There is no rule that says you should be any place different. Your feelings are always right for you. They are right, because you are having them. Please, don’t ever let someone tell you that your feelings are wrong. You are on your own personal journey. Learn to be at peace with it and take time to appreciate the beauty of the path you are on. Whatever you do - Don’t try to jump over onto another person’s path.
It’s perfectly normal to feel all the emotions you have felt since your divorce. It is also typical to stay stuck in one phase or another, if you do not know the tips and techniques required to get you through the divorce recovery faster.
The 7 Biggest Mistakes Women Make That Hinder Them From Moving Forward
1. Listening to Their Inner-Critic
If you are listening to your inner-critic, it is reminding you of all of your limiting beliefs. It may be telling you things like, “everything’s your fault,” “you don’t deserve to be happy,” “you’re too old (ugly, fat, shy etc.),” Many women make mistakes by making decisions due to emotion.
2. Ignoring Their Feelings
Let’s face it NO ONE likes to feel bad. Another reason, you may be ignoring your feelings is because you were taught that certain feelings are unacceptable. Feelings will never stay hidden, they will come out one way or another. They can cause additional stress, illnesses and addictions as well as over-eating. You believe that if you distract yourself, and remain busy that in time the feelings will go away and you never have to deal with them. It is a form of denial.
3. Jumping Into Another Relationship
When a woman jumps into another relationship, she had not given herself time to heal. Chances are the relationship will have many similarities as the one that just ended. You may believe that you need a relationship in order to be happy and worthy. However, to have a loving, healthy relationship, you need to love and value yourself first.
4. Believing They Do Not Need Support
You may be a private person. You may believe you are strong enough to handle it alone. You may not want to burden other people. By nature, we as humans need love and support from other people. With the right kind of support, you will learn tips and techniques so that the grieving process will take less time which will enable you to get on with your life and all that it has to offer.
5. Demonizing Your Ex
You hate your ex for what he did to you. You want him to pay for his actions therefore you like sharing all of the ugly details with everyone – including your children. If you have adult children, you may be trying to get them to see what a rotten S.O.B. he is. While you are busy focusing all of your attention on him, you are not allowing yourself to heal and move forward. You are giving your power over to him.
6. Over-Using Your Divorce Lawyer
Many women are so emotional and they want to tell their attorney all the gory details of their story. This is not the attorney’s job, and you are paying him or her big bucks to listen to your story when all they care about is the facts and nothing but the facts. Your attorney might listen to you, however the law does not care about your emotions.
7. Failing to be Proactive about Their Financial Future
Many women are going from a two income household to one. They might be depending upon alimony or child support. Sadly, many women fail to plan for their financial future and try to maintain the same exact lifestyle that they did while they were married. It’s time to start thinking and planning about your financial future by prioritizing your financial goals and developing realistic expectations.
The #1 Thing No One Tells You About Divorce
I had thought long and hard before I left Earl. I spoke to a few different women that I knew who had got a divorce. I read books. I had thought that I did my research and knew exactly what to expect. Boy was I wrong! The mechanics of the divorce was simple enough. The physical separation even went quite well. As a matter of fact, Earl helped the kids and I move into our new apartment. I did not want our house and neither did he, so we opted to sell it.
It was the grieving process that was pure hell! No one told me about the emotional roller-coaster. No one told me that I would be constantly questioning my decision. They didn’t tell me about the long, lonely nights spent wishing the man you have become accustomed to for years was laying by your side. I wasn’t prepared for bursting into tears every time I passed the “Old Spice” section in the store.
To top it off the song, “Earl Must Die,” by the Dixie Chicks was extremely popular during this time. As many of my friends knew some of the cruel things Earl had done and said to me, they used to like to sing this song to me. It was pure torture! I still loved Earl, and no one could understand that. They all seemed to have their preconceived notions that I hated him.
You see, when you go through a divorce you go through ALL Five Stages of Grief: Denial, Bargaining, Depression, Anger and Acceptance.
You are not only mourning the death of your marriage, but you are also grieving over the loss of your hopes and dreams. Grieving will happen regardless of who initiated the divorce. No one had told me this and I felt as if I was going crazy, not realizing that my emotions were perfectly normal.
If you’re like me, you are terrified of what the future will bring. You are afraid of your finances because you secretly think you will wind up an old cat woman or worse, a bag lady. You may feel as if you are the ugliest woman that ever lived and are unworthy of love. You may think that you are too fat, old or to set in your ways to ever find love again. You are afraid of a future that you have never had to think about before.
Divorce Can Be a Lonely and Scary Place
One of the biggest differences between the death of a spouse and a divorce is the lack of support. If your spouse dies, people rally around you. They bring you casseroles and food to be sure that you are eating.
Your family and friends offer to do clean your house and do errands for you. They let you cry on their shoulder. They tell you to take your time in grieving and to not make any major decisions for at least a year.
In some ways divorce can actually be more painful than the death of a spouse. With death the meaning of your relationship remains intact and is not ripped in a million pieces.
Where’s the support when you go through a divorce?
I have yet to hear of anyone who got the same type of support as a grieving widow. Instead, when you go through a divorce you don’t get any food and you hear things like:
- Just get over it.
- You are better off without him.
- He didn’t deserve you.
- It’s his loss.
All statements like this do is make you feel more alone. You may still love him (even though you think you shouldn’t) and if you told anyone that, they would think that you were certifiably crazy. You are dealing with thoughts and feelings that you have never experienced before, and through it all, you must make major decisions that will affect you for the rest of your life.
Divorce is a very traumatic and emotional time and without support it can seem like a very lonely and scary place. With the right support the grieving process can be accomplished at a faster pace. It is possible to gain clarity and proceed with peace. It is possible to move forward with purpose and confidence.
The grieving process can take a few weeks, months or years. There is no particular order that you will go through the stages and you may find yourself bouncing back and forth between them. Sadly, some women never reach the acceptance stage.
Don’t end up living a miserable life like my Aunt June
Growing up, I always thought that Aunt June was a very angry person. She never seemed to like Uncle Joe much. She constantly criticized him. They never seemed to spend any quality time together. My mom always said that Aunt June was going to leave Uncle Joe as soon as the kids were grown. I could never understand why, because I thought Uncle Joe was one of the nicest men that ever lived. He was indeed, my favorite Uncle.
It wasn’t until I was much older that I understood the anger and bitterness that Aunt June had. She was pregnant with a child the same time that Mom was expecting me. In the seventh month of pregnancy she started bleeding and was in pain. Aunt June claimed that Uncle Joe refused to take her to the hospital for three days. By that time, it was too late and her baby girl died. Aunt June blamed Uncle Joe for her death. She vowed revenge.
Fast forward, twenty years later. Their youngest child graduated from college and Uncle Joe left. He gave Aunt June half of the marital assets. She was financially fit for life. All the split did was create more anger and rage towards Uncle Joe. She vowed:
“I’m going to make Joe pay till the day he dies!”
Aunt June was 55 years old at the time of her divorce. She died at the age of 93. That means she lived 38 years, remaining stuck in the anger stage. She was so full of hatred and rage that she lived every day thinking of ways she could make Uncle Joe pay.
Almost every conversation I had with Aunt June would eventually revolve around the wrongs she endured because of Uncle Joe. She blamed him for her child’s death. She blamed him for her unhappiness. She blamed him for her ailing relationships with her children. She blamed him for everything. Sadly, her hatred and bitterness left no room for a happy, peaceful and fulfilling life.
Are You Feeling Stuck in Anger, Depression or Denial?
If you are stuck in the anger phase of grieving, you may be experiencing thoughts of rage and revenge. You want vindication. You believe he deserves to pay for every single dirty little rotten thing he has ever done. You might even be fantasizing about a long, agonizing painful death for him. You say that he does not deserve forgiveness and that you will never, ever forgive him.
In the depression stage, you don’t feel as if life is worth living without him. You can’t understand why he hurt you so much. You prefer to stay in bed as much as possible. You find it difficult to get dressed, comb your hair, put your makeup on and leave the house. When you do interact with other people, you tell them your story so that they will validate the fact that you are sad and depressed. In a way this gives you permission to remain stuck.
If you are in denial, you are refusing to see the facts in an attempt to take away the pain of grieving your divorce. Despite what the facts tell you, there is a real deep rooted thought and belief that you will reconcile with your former spouse. You may be lying to yourself, by saying that he is going through a stage, or that none of this was his idea.
Regardless which phase you are stuck in, you are obsessed with thoughts of him (and the new woman in his life.) It’s almost as if you can’t stop yourself from looking at his social media profiles, texting or calling him. You may not even recognize who you are anymore. You have a glimpse of the woman you once were and would love to find her again.
When I was in these stages, I can remember doing and saying something, then immediately beating myself up for it. I kept asking myself how I could stop torturing myself this way. I wanted to feel better and just did not know how to.
5 Cycles of the Divorce Recovery Process
The denial stage often begins during the marriage. It may be hard to believe or accept the fact that your marriage is over. You hold on to a sliver of hope that things can be different—that he will change. You believe that the two of you will be able to reignite that magical spark that once occurred in your relationship. Other forms of denial include not believing he wants out of the marriage, not believing that he is in love with another woman, or finding it difficult to believe that this is really happening to you. After all, you never thought you would find yourself in this situation.
The bargaining stage is where you find yourself thinking, “If only…”, “I could have…”, “I should have…”, and “What if?” In essence, you are attempting to change the past through your thoughts. In a way, bargaining is trying to rationalize what happened. You think, “If only I had seen it coming,” “If only I had tried harder,” or, “If only I had forced him to go to counseling, drug rehab, or Alcoholics Anonymous.” You are trying to fix what has already happened. It may also come in the form of revenge toward your ex, by thinking things like, “I want him to be as miserable as I am,” or, “I wish he would just get run over by a bus.”
There are MANY layers of anger. You may be angry at your ex for cheating, leaving you in a financial mess, using alcohol or drugs, or for not caring enough to make things work. You may be directing your anger at others such as his boss for making him work long hours, or the other woman—the home-wrecker that lured him in. Your anger may be turned inward towards yourself for not seeing the writing on the wall, putting up with his crap for as long as you did, or for not showing him the love and respect that he craved.
You may just want to bury yourself under the covers for months after the split. You are not eating, exercising, or sleeping properly. The nights are filled with restless sleep and dreams of what might have been, as well as nightmares that you will wind up a bag lady alone on the streets. You may feel a deep sadness over the loss of your marriage and be hurt that his vows did not mean as much to him as they did to you. You shed tons of tears for the man you thought he was.
Acceptance comes when you fully accept the fact that your marriage, as well as your hopes and dreams for the future together, are over. It is at this point that you are ready to build a new life for yourself. You may feel twinges of pain now and again, but for the most part, you feel indifference for who your ex is and what he is doing.
Being able to identify these phases of grief will help to speed you the divorce recovery process. You are like the foundation of a house. It can withstand fire as well as the most severe of storms. You built your marriage on top of this foundation. The marriage crumbled, the walls came falling down, and you grieved. Divorce recovery is sweeping away the debris, so that you are left with a strong foundation to build your new life on.
How to Speed Up Your Divorce Recovery in 3 Steps
1. Feel your feelings.
If you are anything like me, the last thing you want to do is to actually sit there and feel your feelings. Just talking about what happened is not feeling, and may actually make you feel worse. This means that you have to 100% acknowledge the way you feel and why you feel this way. If you’re happy and ecstatic, you like those feelings. You want more of them. However, when we are grieving, we want it to be over as fast as possible. We do anything to avoid feeling anything that makes us sad, angry or depressed.
Many women believe that if they forgive, they are condoning what was done to them, or are somehow letting the ex off the hook. Forgiveness is done for you. To forgive is to mend your broken heart. In the words of Lewis B. Smedes, “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”
3. Forge Ahead!
It is difficult, but not impossible to put aside your fears and step out of your comfort zone. Each step becomes easier and easier. I started dating Earl when I was 16-years old. When I left him, I had literally never attended any sort of function on my own. To push my limits, I first joined a Country Line Dancing class. Then came the BIG step, I attended my 20-year high school reunion stag. At first, I felt as if everyone was staring at me, wondering why I was alone. As the night progressed I stopped worrying about what others were thinking and began to enjoy myself.
How I discovered to breakthrough my divorce depression and rebounded into my normal life in a few short weeks
I longed for the time I could go an entire day without crying and without being afraid of my future. I craved peace. I felt so empty and so alone. I wasn’t familiar with the person I was during this time and wondered who I was and what would become of me.
I was on the phone with Earl one night to discuss child support and alimony. During the conversation, he stated that he could not alter it due to a demotion. He followed with the statement that crushed my soul, “Losing $10,000 a year hurt me more than you leaving.” It hurt and cut so deep. After the anger subsided, I felt worthless.
I began reading any and every book I could find on divorce recovery and happiness. I was on mission to discover what my purpose in life was and the fastest way to get there. I spoke to other women who had flourished after their divorce.
My life coach said one profound statement to me - Your life is your choice.
Then I discovered a simple process which sped up my divorce recovery and allowed me to be happier than I had been in years.
I made a decision to let go. I began focusing on myself and implemented the tips and strategies that I had learned. I knew that I need to work on forgiveness due to the depression and anger that I felt, in order to start healing and get on with the next chapter of my life.
Within a few short weeks I was no longer crying half the day. I was not obsessing about my ex and wondering what he was doing or who he was with. I was no longer trying to rewrite the past with “if only’s.” I stopped trying to figure out why everything had happened.
Most of all I learned to love myself, to embrace the magnificent woman within, and I began looking forward to a bright new beginning.
Interestingly, within a month of beginning this process, I landed a promotion that I had been longing for.
~ Cindy Holbrook, Divorce Coach
The “Key Secret” for Rapid and Compassionate Divorce Recovery
Getting to the acceptance stage is great, but that in of itself DOES NOT mean that you are happy and looking forward to your life. With compassionate divorce recovery, you not only learn to accept what has happened, but you find yourself. You come to a place where you are your own best friend and are true to what you like and do not like. You take control of your life and stop letting other people and circumstances to govern how you show up in this world.
The Key is discovering, “How do you like your eggs?”
Let me explain. I am a big fan of the movie, “Runaway Bride.” Julia Roberts craves love. She is engaged four times and each time, she gets afraid and runs away at the altar. Richard Gere is a struggling writer, who is assigned the task of writing and article about her. During his research he learns that each of her jilted boyfriends claim that she likes her eggs the same way that they did. This concerns Richard as a romance has begun to bloom between him and Julia.
There is a scene in the show where Gere sits Roberts down at a table loaded with eggs cooked every way imaginable. He asks her, “How do you like your eggs?” She evades answering the question by asking him, “How do you like yours?”
You see, Julia’s character was like so many of us. She was afraid to make her own decisions. She wanted to be loved and accepted so desperately, that she was willing to give up a part of herself to get it. However, Richard was a very wise soul. He knew that in order for her to ever be truly happy, she needed to figure out what she liked and did not like. She needed to be happy and content with who she was. It took a while, but in time she found out how she liked her eggs.
The longer a marriage is, the more parts of you that you have pushed aside. For example, I had decided I liked Bleu Cheese dressing and Pepsi, just because Earl did. I really like Ranch dressing the best. However, while I was married to Earl I would always order Bleu Cheese dressing on my salads. Earl also thought that watching shows about ghosts and UFOs was stupid, so even though I found them interesting, I would never watch them.
Be True to Yourself - Embrace the Magnificent Woman Within
As little girls, we were never taught how to embrace our inner being. Most of us were taught that we were to be selfless, to nurture those around us. We were taught that the path to our happiness was to give to everyone around us and that our desires did not matter much. Our mothers, grandparents, and aunts were WRONG!
The secret to being happy is to follow your passions. It’s to be true to yourself. When you love yourself and pursue things that make you happy, this is when the magic happens. You see, when you begin to love and honor yourself, the people around you change. They begin to treat you the same way you are treating yourself.
Embracing the magnificent woman within takes some soul-searching. It takes facing your fears and stepping out of your comfort zone and exploring the world around you. It takes you asking yourself, what it is that you really enjoy and want to do and learning to listen to that quiet little voice inside that always shows you the way.
You may be asking: “What will be different when I embrace the woman within?” or “How will I know when I find my magnificent woman within?”
- You will be true to your beliefs and values.
- You will begin to be happier for no apparent reason.
- You will have more confidence than ever.
- You will be at peace with yourself and the world around you.
- You will be doing things that you love to do.
- You will be able to say, “No” without feeling guilty.
- You will be able to hear and listen to your own intuition.
- You will notice that other people are treating you differently - with more respect and kindness.
3 Shifts Kelly experienced moving her from a miserable divorcee to an amazing woman living a fulfilled life
Kelli had been divorced for two years when she began working with me. Due to an illness, Kelli was confined to a wheel chair. She would literally spend days in bed, hiding under the covers. She blamed her ex for leaving her. She blamed her disability on being lonely. She didn’t believe that she had anything to offer anyone.
Kelli actively tried every strategy I shared with her. She continues to use many of these simple strategies on a daily basis to this day.
The first shift came in only a few days. Kelli, found that she would actually get up, get dressed and brush her hair daily. She found that this drastically improved her mood. She began sleeping and eating better. She felt lighter, happier and hopeful.
The second shift came when Kelli began to venture outdoors. She lived on a river, with a beautiful walkway, where people went to exercise or just take in the magical view. She began taking a short stroll along the river every morning. She was amazed by how friendly people were and began to make many acquaintances. She began accepting invitations to parties and barbeques. She even started her own book club.
The third shift came when Kelli joined an online dating site for the disabled. She began dating again and discovered that many men found her loving, charming and interesting. She found out that her wheel-chair was only an obstacle if she allowed it to be.
She had found that life was worth living and that she no longer had to wallow in the past. Her divorce could only define her as much as she let it. Kelli no longer made excuses to stay stuck in depression. She knew that her life was in her hands and decided to make it be a happy one. She made many friends which filled her need for intellectual conversation as well as companionship.
Introducing the First Ever Step-By-Step Compassionate Divorce Recovery Program
The Compassionate Divorce Recovery Program was created with you in mind. I don’t want any woman who has experienced divorce to feel empty, alone and isolated. My wish for you is to heal and recover from your divorce so that you can create a fantastic life that brings you joy, happiness and fulfillment.
It is a 90 day support system for women recovering from divorce that will lead you through each step of the grieving process. When you complete the program, you will be armed with all of the tools you need to live a happy and fulfilling life, while honoring the past without regrets or resentment.
So, Exactly What Will You Get with the Compassionate Divorce Recovery Formula?
You will understand the 5 stages of grieving your divorce and be able to move through them twice as fast with our strategies than you would be able to on your own.
Detox yourself from all the negative emotions connected to your past relationship(s) that you are holding onto, such as anger and frustration.
Fall in love with the magnificent woman within and become your own best friend as you heal and become whole by yourself.
You will create dream board of your ideal most fulfilling life and have the action steps to pursue it.
Identify and embrace most amazing and brilliant present and future that you truly desire.
You will be open to the relationship of your dreams if and when you are ready to pursue one.
You will be surrounding yourself with other amazing and forward thinking women that are excited about healing and living life to the fullest.
You will have an assortment of strategies and techniques that will enable you to move forward with Peace, Confidence, Clarity and Grace
A simple technique Kristin learned to diminish the pain in her aching heart
I began coaching Kristin at the beginning of the separation process. Kristin was blindsided. Her husband of 18-years suddenly decided he wanted a divorce. He told her that he wanted different things than she could offer.
Kristin wasn’t even aware that there were any problems in her marriage. She thought they were both happy. She considered him her best friend and soul mate. Family and friends called them the perfect couple.
From the beginning Kristin complained of a REAL aching heart. She felt as if her heart would explode. It scared her. She wondered if her emotional pain was creating a real and life-threatening physical condition.
I assured her that this was a very normal feeling. I advised her to go the doctors, just to be safe. However, emotional pain can and does cause real physical pain. Kristin’s emotional heart was literally breaking.
I taught her to feel the pain. I assured her that her heart would not really break and that it was ok to hurt. I showed her a breathing technique to watch the pain, to allow it to heighten to almost unbearable pain and then to let it subside.
Kristin did what so many people try to do when they are in physical pain because of an emotional issue. She tried to make it go away. The truth is that it will not go away until it is felt.
I told Kristin that every time her heart began to ache to breathe and to allow the pain to be there without judging it or trying to stop it. Sometimes the pain does completely go away after one session. However, more times than not, it will keep returning. Each time it returns it is less intense. The length of time between episodes becomes longer and longer. Soon the pain is completely gone.
Kristin liked this strategy so much, that she is now constantly telling her friends to breathe and to accept the pain until it is gone. She says this is one strategy had helped her to let go and move on.
Here’s How You KNOW this Program Is For You
I believe there are NO accidents. You landed on this page for a reason. You have also read this far. This tells me that you want to heal. This tells me that deep inside you know that there is a better way. There is an answer. You are the type of woman that takes action and makes things happen in life. You refuse to sit back and play victim. You are tied of the fear and the confusion and want to forge ahead to the next chapter of your life.
- You are sick and tired of being in pain
- You want to feel like your old self again
- You value the experiences of other women
- You want to learn to trust your intuition
- You want to be able trust again
- You want your divorce recovery to be as quick as possible
- You have decided that you will do whatever it takes to live a happy life
How Will You Feel When You Release the Pain From Your Past?
You might be wondering, “Is this course for me?” Also, “How big of an investment is the Compassionate Divorce Recovery Program?”
If you really want to accomplish all of the things we discussed, such as understanding what stage of grief you are in, how to speed up your recovery process, how to rid yourself of negative emotions and to be set free from your painful history (you can never forget it, but you can prevent it from ruining your present and your future.) How much would all of this be worth to you?
What would you be ready and willing to pay for peace of mind and for a happy future?
Women tell me all of the time that peace and happiness are priceless. And then they pass on it when the cost is presented. Don’t be one of those women that will let her life slip away because of a little bit of money. Let’s be honest, it’s either priceless or it’s not. You can always make up for money you spend; however you cannot ever get your time back.
- “What is it costing me to not having peace of mind and clarity about my future right now?”
- “How much is it worth to me to have peace of mind and clarity?”
- “What would it mean to me to have peace of mind and clarity regarding my future?”
Wouldn’t it be amazing to be able to let go of your past, gain confidence, be at peace and to have clarity about creating an extra-ordinary future for yourself? How would you feel?
Are you willing to put up with another 6 to 12 months of being miserable, sleepless nights, fear, anger, depression and anxiety? What is 12 months of your life worth? Only you can put a price on it.
When I coach women personally, their investment is up to $3,000 for roughly 20 hours of my time. Is a year of your life being miserable and living unhappily worth $3,000? Being miserable eats you up inside, just like a cancer. It is slowly killing you.
Let’s review the value that you are getting in this course:
- My typical coaching fees - $3,000
- Recordings of all of the sessions - $997
- Private Facebook group - Priceless
- A happier, more peaceful future - Priceless
- Increased confidence - Priceless
Don’t worry, I’m not going to charge you $3,997, your cost is significantly less! You know why? It’s because I have a passion for helping women recovery quickly from their divorce. I want to make it accessible to those that really need it. I finally settled on $997, since I can leverage my time. However, because you are here right now, I will give you a scholarship and you will receive an additional $500 off! Making it ONLY $497.
What Will YOUR Personal Story Be 6 Months From Now
6 months is not a very long time, however MAJOR LIFE SHIFTS can happen in this short period. While you are grieving, it may be difficult to think that far ahead, however it is imperative to your divorce recovery. You need to STOP and THINK about the story you will be telling. It’s your choice to stay where you’re at or step out of your comfort zone and do something new in order to get different result.
If you choose to do nothing or continue to do what you are doing, you will be in the same place you are now. Is this acceptable to you?
When you choose to join and participate in the Compassionate Divorce Recovery Program, I can guarantee you that you will be in a different place. During the program, you will be given the opportunity to explore where you want to be, and will have the tools you need to get there. How fast you arrive, is totally up to you.
Here Are Just Two of the MANY Strategies Taught In the course
1. It is 100% impossible for you to have a positive and a negative thought at the same time. Therefore, when you feel the anger mounting inside of you into a boiling rage, STOP! Redirect your mind to something that makes you happy. You can do this completely with your thoughts, or it might help to have a physical object to look at such as a picture or some sort of small token. The picture or thought could be of your child, grandchild or pet. A token could be a small seashell that mentally brings you to the ocean, where you feel happy, safe and free.
2. When your thoughts are full of regrets of the past or fears of the future, bring your mind back to the present moment with five simple questions:
- What do you see? ~ Such as pictures on the wall, leaves blowing in the wind, or the hummingbirds outside of your window.
- What do you hear? ~ Maybe the laughter of children in the other room, cars driving down the street or droplets of rain falling on the roof.
- What do you feel? ~ This is your sense, not emotions. You may feel the clothes you are wearing or the chair you are sitting in.
- What do you smell? ~ The fresh air after the morning dew, scented candles burning in the background, a variety of perfumes or cologne.
- What do you taste? ~ This might be nothing. It could be a breath-mint, or the lingering taste of a savoring cup of herbal tea.
By focusing on your five senses you are purely in the moment. It is good to practice being in the moment when you are not emotional. Perhaps you can start in the shower, while you are driving or while exercising. The more you practice being in the present moment, the easier it is to get there in times of stress. When you are focused on the now, you will be inviting peace into your heart as the stresses melt away.
Listen to What Women Are Saying About Cindy’s Compassionate Divorce Recovery Process
Cindy is such a good soul and truly listens. She is concerned with my well-being and helped me to change my life for the better by providing tools to help me let go and move on. She helped me to understand that there are things I need to resolve in myself and understand, before I can before I can make sense of what happened. ~ Suzi C. Arizona
I feel grateful that Cindy appeared in my life, like an angel at my door. She is easy to lean on and talk to. She is a person that held me accountable. The tips she gave me helped to heal the deep wounds I had, which has aided in me becoming proactive to change my life. ~ Ella Z. Oregon
~ Elizabeth M. California
Here’s What Is Included In the Compassionate Divorce Recovery Program
A proven, step-by-step Divorce Recovery formula you will receive the exact steps that I use with many of my private one-on-one clients.
- Private Facebook Group for you to interact with other women going through the same thing and access to me, your coach. I will personally answer each question posted in this private group.
- Easy access to each coaching session by phone from the comfort of your own home or office. No airline tickets. No travel. No hassle.
- Lifetime access to all training materials. All calls are recorded for easy access and download, so you can listen and re–listen anytime you want, as many times as you want.
- Eight weekly group coaching sessions each week we will tackle a different area of your divorce recovery. PLUS at the end of each session, you will be able to ask me about any challenges you are currently facing to receive laser coaching right on the call. (Don’t worry, ALL calls are recorded, so if you miss one you will still get all the information.)
- Module 1 – Understanding the 5 Stages of Grief
When you go through a divorce, you grieve the loss of your marriage as well as your hopes and dreams. When you understand each stage and have techniques to get through them, you will find that you can come to the acceptance step at lightning speed.
- Module 2 – How to Deal with Your Ex
You may still be in the legal process of divorce, which includes trying to come up with a settlement with your ex. If your divorce is over and you have children, (regardless of their ages) your ex will pop in and out of your life forever. You may run into him around town or hear about him from friends. There are specific actions that you can put into place that will enable you to handle all of the above scenarios plus more.
- Module 3 - Identify Your Triggers and Limiting Beliefs
You will learn strategies to quiet the inner-critic. Triggers are situations that create negative reactions inside of you. Limiting beliefs are often what keeps you stuck and prevents you from moving forward. During this module, you will discover how to identify your triggers and stop them in their tracks.
- Module 4 - Letting Go of the Pain
You’ll learn several techniques to feel your feelings and then let it go. Once you acknowledge and accept what you feel, it is easier to release its hold on you so that you can move forward and experience more inner-peace.
- Module 5 – Embrace the Magnificent Woman Within
Discover the parts of you that you may have lost or put aside in your attempts to be a good wife. Gain the courage to step out of your comfort zone to ascertain your likes and dislikes. You’ll also learn how to be true to yourself by asking for what you want.
- Module 6 – Developing Positive Relationships
During your divorce you may have lost some friends and extended family. This can be tough, and often makes women feel lonely, so they jump into another romantic relationship way to soon. We’ll be discussing how to trust your intuition, being assertive and demanding respect in order to develop positive lasting relationships with your current friends as well as the new ones you will meet.
- Module 7 – Set Yourself Free With Forgiveness
You might be saying, I’ll never forgive him, or, his actions are unforgivable. Find out what forgiveness is, and an easy three step process to forgive anyone you need to (including yourself) so that you can unlock the doors of your heart that have been keeping you prisoner.
- Module 8 – Creating Your Extra-Ordinary Future
Yes, it’s true you get to write your future! What will it be? During the call you will discover what would make your life happy, fun and fulfilling. We will also be going over an easy worksheet that will enable you to create your financial future as well.
- Module 1 – Understanding the 5 Stages of Grief
You Will Also Receive these Bonuses Valued at $575.
Because Your Divorce Recovery Is VERY Important to Me.
- Daily Encouragement in short emails for 90 days (value: $97)
- Empowering worksheets to enable you to grow and let go (value: $47)
- Building confidence visualization audio (value $47)
- Checklists to keep you on track (value $37)
- TWO Private laser coaching days to get coached one-on-one by Cindy (value: $200)
- BONUS Call – Forming an Action Plan (value $147) -The fastest way to make your dreams come true is to create goals, discover the path to obtain them and to focus on how great it will feel once it is obtained. During the call you will be identifying what your three most important goals are and determine concrete steps for you to reach them within the next 6 months.
The course begins on Thursday, May 7th, 2015; 4:30 PST
Sign Up Today to receive your $500. Scholarship and SAVE!!
You pay ONLY $497.
If you are on the fence, think about this, I am taking ALL of the risks. You have One Full Year to put the strategies to work …
Our 1- Year Money Back Guarantee
Risk-Free Guarantee! Take 1 FULL YEAR to decide. I want you to be a raving fan of the Compassionate Divorce Recovery program. I am so convinced this program will change your life I am giving you one full year to put it to work. If after 1 full year of applying the principles you will learn here, if you’re not completely convinced it was worth 5-10x the tuition then ask for a refund. The only thing that’s asked of me is that I show that I completely implemented all the strategies for at least 90 days. That’s how serious I am about helping you change your life.